Smell Yo Dick: Don’t you trust me! [VIDEO]
Posted by: SBM in Video, tags: cheating, Relationships, trust, VideoSomeone sent me this as just a random video on youtube that was funny, but I couldn’t help but think of the bigger issue behind the concept.
To those who can’t or don’t care to watch it, here is the story:
- Man comes back from club
- The girlfriend has been sent pictures of her boyfriend talking to another women by her best friend
- In order to dispel her suspicions … she demands her boyfriend to drop his pants and let her smell his dick (operating under the premise it still smells like pussy)
Generally speaking its a bootlegg music video and the general ignorance of the song is the reason I weep for hip hop (although I am still a Webbie fan), but there is a significantly more important question it made me thinkg about …
Does his refusal to let her smell her dick imply that he was guilty?
Generalized further …
Is the defense of “you should trust me” and “I’m mad you asked me that” a valid defense, or does this just mean your guilty?
I’d answer the question … but honestly … I’m not sure
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May 14th, 2008 at 6:51 am
it doesn’t mean he’s guilty it could simply mean he feels he’s above that level of childishness. its like for real if he’s that stupid to not have rinsed off with hot water before returning to his home u dnt really want his funky behind anyway!
May 14th, 2008 at 7:22 am
I know some dick smellers, I heard one excuse was “I was playing basketball It got me sweaty”
May 14th, 2008 at 7:58 am
I agree with Sankofa. If you are reduced to doing it, my feeling is you probably don’t have to ask. You ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER!!!!
I don’t think women (or men for that matter) ever really trust their gut. A good Gut check in my belief have saved people’s lives literally and figuratively.
May 14th, 2008 at 8:02 am
oh wait…i just re-read Sankofa. I think we are saying something a little different. I wouldn’t even get into the question. If I’m compelled to ask, I already know the answer. And rinsing off before you come home, does not really make you a man of standard in my estimation. It just makes you a man who would like to avoid the question OR pass the smell test.
May 14th, 2008 at 8:16 am
LMAO! Okay, first off…I’m so upset they even made a video and a song like this!
Secondly, if you have to smell your man’s penis - - - clearly, it’s time for you to roll bounce!!! Trust is a beautiful thing and if you don’t have any for your mate then it’s time for you to find another one and leave the one you have ALONE. Ignorance seems to be an epidemic in the hip hop culture nowadays {shame}.
Bottomline - it’s not a instant guilty…it’s a instant “he thought she was stupid for asking so he’s not going there”!
May 14th, 2008 at 8:40 am
The other thing too is unless Married women are asking these questions, this video is suggesting alot of risky behavior is taking place in the random dating pool—unless the sniffers also have a nose for latex.
May 14th, 2008 at 8:57 am
“Ignorance seems to be an epidemic in the hip hop culture nowadays {shame}. ” You have never lied! I saw this ignorant crap about 3 weeks ago.
The sniffers should also have a nose for Dail, Irish Spring, Tone…he shouldn’t smell like Ivory after leaving a club.
May 14th, 2008 at 9:10 am
LOL@ “he shouldn’t smell like Ivory after leaving a club.”
I was thinking the same thing.
Also, I agree that trust is key in a relationship. If you’re reduced to the smell test (or checking the phone bill, etc) then it’s time to move on. You’d be surprised how accurate your intuition can be … and it only gets stronger as you’ve been in the relationship or known the person longer.
Lastly, I hung my head in shame for these “women” who made this song and then had the nerve to make a video so that there images could be attached to think sort of thing for all posterity. And, I wept slightly for the poor souls who watched this video, took it to heart, and instituted the smell test (as well as those who already did it anyway and were just validated by this song).
May 14th, 2008 at 9:20 am
“You’d be surprised how accurate your intuition can be … and it only gets stronger as you’ve been in the relationship or known the person longer.”
Good God this is true. I think somebody should answer this video with their own catchy hook about how dumb and demeaning as hell this all is.
I also weep for women who “compete” for these types of men.
May 14th, 2008 at 9:23 am
I watched this video a few days ago along with “soulja girl goes crazy on the marta”
“blank stare”
Whats the world coming to really….
May 14th, 2008 at 9:46 am
I can’t see the video, but I don’t need to, I’m pretty sure I get the jist of it!
Funny thing is, you are so sure he was doing something, no matter what you smell, you’ll think it’s pussy. What the hell are you gonna say when it smells like straight funk?? “Oh my bad boo, you straight”
B.S.!! This is similar to people who sniff thru emails ans txt msgs, then not believing the truth.
Get a grip ladies!!
May 14th, 2008 at 9:46 am
I can’t see the video, but I don’t need to, I’m pretty sure I get the jist of it!
Funny thing is, you are so sure he was doing something, no matter what you smell, you’ll think it’s pussy. What the hell are you gonna say when it smells like straight funk?? “Oh my bad boo, you straight”
B.S.!! This is similar to people who sniff thru emails and txt msgs, then not believing the truth.
Get a grip ladies!!
May 14th, 2008 at 10:11 am
Now, me and an ex-boyfriend shared the same phone service (mistake #1). I received the bill and just gave him the grand total to pay. Unfortunately, I saw that the bill began to increase. After searching through the bill, with no suspicion that he was “cheating” I noticed several text messages at inappropriate times of the night. He swore that he didn’t have anything going on with this lady, just friendship. We ended the relationship back in Oct 2006. However, I feel that I could have handled the situation differently. How do you handle a situation like this when the writings are on the wall. Just leaving is always easier said than done.
May 14th, 2008 at 10:21 am
This is my last reply for a few hours. THEN I MUST WORK. Instead of making my day extra extra long.
^^^Neonnea, there are some things that you CAN’T articulate. That you just know. Sometimes its really NOT about the text or about an email specifically. I can bet you dollars for donuts that the text didn’t end it. There were other things, other knowings that you couldn’t go directly to.
SOMETIMES its about how you relate to one another. Sometimes the pairing is just off or wrong or ran its course. Sometimes things are over long before its OVER. The gut check to me is a clue that something needs to be addressed or ex’d and next’d.
May 14th, 2008 at 10:28 am
“Just leaving is always easier said than done.”
agree but the purge makes space for something better. I believe that quality men can also SNIFF trashy men around you. This is why I am doing my own housecleaning as we speak ASAP.
May 14th, 2008 at 10:31 am
No, the texts didn’t end it….Dude was something like a simp and I felt that he “put me on a pedastal”. Then again, I was probably just a token young chick to him. I didn’t think about it, but the pairing was off. We were on different paths of life. I wanted someone who was good to me and I looked pass the things that I didn’t really like.
May 14th, 2008 at 10:33 am
Comeback, I know you suppose to get back to work but…um, please explain: “I believe that quality men can also SNIFF trashy men around you”
May 14th, 2008 at 10:34 am
^^^ Neonnea are you my distant cousin????
“We were on different paths of life. I wanted someone who was good to me and I looked pass the things that I didn’t really like.”
I can so relate.
May 14th, 2008 at 10:44 am
““I believe that quality men can also SNIFF trashy men around you””
It’s just something I have always believed. I think I will blog about it after my Lalah hiatus (as you probably know most of my blog is now devoted to her 6/3/08 “Self Portrait” release…or maybe I’ll start a new but related blog devoted directly to my renewal, qwest and comittment to really getting the love I deserve.
I reallly believe that when you are in “entangled” with or attracting substandard men (or man), men of standard can feel and see it in your vibe. Its in your conversations, behavior EVERYTHING. I think when your relationship “shyt” is together or at least your are making a concerted effort, you just attract better people ALL AROUND. Men show up that you never even knew existed. But first I do believe you have to clean the space up.
be back later….
May 14th, 2008 at 11:22 am
@Comeback: I’m shocked … but I agree with something you said.
“I reallly believe that when you are in “entangled” with or attracting substandard men (or man), men of standard can feel and see it in your vibe.”
I agree with this. Girls who mess with slum guys, or have a slum n*gga resume when it comes to dating always appear less desirable to me. I can’t help but think why she always goes for these horrible guys and what does it say about her.
Its just a point I’ve reiterated a couple times (although many disagree) … the actions of your past do tell something about the person (well … recent past).
May 14th, 2008 at 11:28 am
Well HOT diggidy dam&n I’m shocked you’re shocked!!!
But I would like to make a clarification a slum/substandard or otherwise trashy dude, can also come along with a BA,BS, JD, MBA. PhD, ESQ, PM, MD, CPA etc etc after his name. It often takes a little longer to uncover the BS under the degreed “accomplished” exterior.
May 14th, 2008 at 11:34 am
If you have to stoop to the level of asking the man to drop his drawers there’s a more serious issue here–trust #1. If you suspect he’s cheating, I’m sure this isnt’ the first sign.
I would be suspect of why my friend is sending me the pic in the first place. I can post a picture and each one of you here may see something different. If the man is going to the club without his girlfriend it does not necessary mean he’s looking for new prey, it could just be a night out with the boys. Lets keep it real…he’s at a club so he will more than likely be talking to women…he might do some flirting but he knows where to draw the line. If he’s truly committed to his girlfriend he’s not going to jeopordize what he has at home.
May 14th, 2008 at 11:36 am
unless the sniffers also have a nose for latex.
The Comeback Girl…lol…and you know I don’t know about you other ladies but I ain’t trying to be sniffing no man’s body’s private parts.
May 14th, 2008 at 11:39 am
I agree with what has been said.
1. It’s a dumbass question (if she already has the pictures, isn’t that enough?)
2. Asking to smell his dick is a better indicator of YOUR insecurities and silliness than his fidelity
3. Assuming you DO smell some other chick on him, well now you got mystery pu**y on your nose. Ew.
4. By consenting to let her smell you, you’re really consenting to an intrusion upon your body and your dignity.
5. There are no winners here.
May 14th, 2008 at 11:49 am
How do you handle a situation like this when the writings are on the wall. Just leaving is always easier said than done.
Neonnea, yes it’s easier said than done. Hopefully you’ll never get in that type of situation again. Even when confronted most men will deny they are cheating. If his actions are different than normal and you’ve seen other signs of cheating, then go with your instincts. Normally your instincts are right. At that point, you have to be the one to decide on how to proceed with your life. If you decide to stay then it won’t be the man’s fault at that point. People can only do to us what we allow them to do.
May 14th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
There ain’t gonna be no sniffy sniffy round here. If a woman feels she has to sniff, she doesn’t trust me. If there is no trust, there is no relationship.
May 14th, 2008 at 12:30 pm
Antidater I agree…“If there is no trust, there is no relationship.”
May 14th, 2008 at 1:46 pm
@ Cousin: “But I would like to make a clarification a slum/substandard or otherwise trashy dude, can also come along with a BA,BS, JD, MBA. PhD, ESQ, PM, MD, CPA etc etc after his name. It often takes a little longer to uncover the BS under the degreed “accomplished” exterior.”
Speak! Preach!
@Shelia: The relationship became long distance (3hr driving time) because of a career opportunity and he would drive to see me every Wednesday and every weekend. I definitely agree that people do what you allow them to do.
@ndenise: Bottom line, that is a lose lose situation.
@antidater: Can I smell yo….neck? I’m a sucka for colognes
May 14th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
And goodness forbid when you put your nose down there you smell another PENIS!
May 14th, 2008 at 2:26 pm
@neonnea
About this smelling necks business… i’m all about that. I think I violate men on the regular by smelling their necks! They love it though.
May 14th, 2008 at 2:45 pm
2. Asking to smell his dick is a better indicator of YOUR insecurities and silliness than his fidelity.
Nice one ndenise. A man will never be flirtatious, get close with any other women, and focus on his own woman, etc…and he will STILL be suspected of eying other girls or cheating. It usually happens when the guy is somewhat good looking and/or very confident, and the woman involved has some level of personal insecurity or is prone to being jealous. That woman may not ever let it rest unless the guy is with her 24/7. It works both ways. It’s also a damn shame. Is there really any non dick-smelling, foolproof way to say “I’m not cheating”?
May 14th, 2008 at 2:45 pm
@Neonnea: Yes you may…if you are close enough you can get a whiff of the Gautier.
May 14th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
@antidater: Ooohhh la la…..
May 14th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
LOL @ Ms. Freckles. But that begs the question … if you smell ass do you assume its a guy … or he just paid the stipper extra for the “deluxe” package?
@Certified Vibrations: Yeah there is … chasity belt that only your woman has the key too … thats about all that would keep her happy.
And speaking of insecurities, the rapper in the video really aint cute … might explain some things
May 14th, 2008 at 4:11 pm
not to be an antagonistic bastard… but Id just like to point out that this thread STARTED with comeback skimming…. AGAIN (falls n the floor laughing)
but seriously this is beyond hood and beyond childish. You realy dont want to catch your partner t there. its just another argument. if you like them enouogh to stay …. then you stay. if you think you can do better witout them then why lk fr a reason to jet to justify yourself? just jet
with that being said……
I give… and always have, women access to my Home PC, cellphone PDA and personal email. just out of respect, and to cause less arguments and paranoia.
May 14th, 2008 at 4:41 pm
“I give… and always have, women access to my Home PC, cellphone PDA and personal email. just out of respect, and to cause less arguments and paranoia.”
If a woman is insecure, she is insecure. She doesn’t need to go through all of that (coming from the cell phone skimmer herself - but I was doing it for business/financial reasons). SBM pointed out that the rapper of the video wasn’t attractive (to each is own). Past experiences can have a negative impact on how you go about dealing with your current relationship.
May 14th, 2008 at 5:26 pm
If you have to demean yourself by asking to sniff someone’s rod, then it was OVER a long time ago. It was probably over at the beginning.
May 14th, 2008 at 5:29 pm
@HNIC: WTF man!!! Damn that … even if you don’t have anything to hide … why would you want to sacrifice your privacy. Suppose you send a text saying she is acting like a b* … does she need to read that??? STOP IT!
May 14th, 2008 at 5:30 pm
The sadddest part of it all is that we don’t really have an equivalent test. There is no telling what its gonna smell like on any given day of the week.
May 14th, 2008 at 6:01 pm
SBM: I never had anythin to hide, that I didnt feel I couldnt take the heat for if she wanted to look. privacy? are you fuckin kidding me? look man If I live with a woman theres no such thing as privacy. she can look at whatever she wants.
2nd. sure we have an equivalent. I caught a girlfriend out there because she was loose. theres no defense for it since most women rub their cllit to attain orasm… not shove a fist into themselves.
But seriously.. this is a poor topic for the blog. most f us are black… which means we arent in committed relationships anyway. especially long term ones. We need to focus more on dating issues and why we cant get to the point where we need to smell my dick before talkin about actually doin it. I havent been on a successful 3rd date wit a any sista this YEAR.
May 14th, 2008 at 7:09 pm
@HNIC: Turning over access to all that stuff isn’t respect. I wouldn’t feel like a man respects me more because he gives me that kind of access. I don’t want to read his stuff. We have trust issues if I even think I need to scan his personal shit for clues. Now, on the other side of things, you shouldn’t go out of you way to hide it either.
Also, that’s really sad about not having a successful 3rd date. It’s MAY! Then again, if you’re looking for tips via a blog (no blow at SBM), that might be an indicator. LOL.
May 14th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
@HNIC: That’s it! Stop Simpin!! I feel the need to take up a collection to send you to Seduction and Self-respect training courses.
May 14th, 2008 at 10:32 pm
to me the state of dating and relationships is at an all time low. women are reduced to sniffing men’s penis’s and men are screaming they want a woman to pay their bills. this shi* is backwards maybe chilvary is dead. all this goes back to an issue of trust if you have a bond of trust with the person u are with they could bring u a smoking pair of panties and u still wouldn’t believe that your man did the crime. fidelity is a learned behavior s o is it safe to say some people missed their lessons? or are they just slow?
in the eternal words of the movie baby boy..
“Jodie, Jodie !!! Lemme smell ya dick, I knew u was f*ucking!” LOL!!
May 14th, 2008 at 11:32 pm
HELL NO!!! He shouldn’t let her smell his dick. If she don’t trust her man then she need to move the hell on. That is so ridiculous. What does she think she going to find out? Maybe he showered before the other chick house. I don’t think he is guilty if he doesn’t let her smell his dick.
No those reply doesn’t mean he is guilty. She knows something anyway if she is asking that dumb ass question. If I was a dude I would leave her for asking me that. If her gut is telling her something is wrong smelling his dick is not going to tell her the answer.
Some men are dumb enough to let her smell it though.
May 15th, 2008 at 4:16 am
uh
whatnafuck?
if you gotta smell anyone’s dick, trust left that relationship long ago
just let it go